Where did we go wrong?

Disclaimer: This is a particularly big rant of mine so be prepared to read some ill articulated verses about how I hate everything. Oh yeah also I'm not making generalizations but there is enough of a sample size that such a post can be made. Reader discretion is advised yada yada

Society says that we are supposed to have a cordial daily relationship with our neighbours so that we may aid them in their time of need and vice versa. While I don't disagree with the idea I probably won't keep my end of the bargain and will most likely minimize my interaction with my neighbours in the first place.

The reason for this? Well two reasons actually, The first is my social awkwardness making me completely useless and reducing me to a bumbling baboon of sorts. Second would be the fact that Indian Neighbours have given me the most sour taste about neighbours in general.

The bible says, "Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself". For the the uninitiated in English used in older times it basically says that you must love your neighbour as you love yourself. It really does send this message of community,love and peace. Its mostly wasted on me because I would hate to have an Indian household next to me as my neighbour. Indians are known for their famous hospitality and the phrase "Atithi Devo Bhava" meaning the guest is equivalent to God. I can't say that from what I've seen of neighbours and relatives in India I feel much of that love.

Indians in general have this habit of talking about their relatives behind their back, and commenting about what they feel is wrong with them about certain individuals. I'm not saying that only Indians exclusively do this but I've grown up in an Indian household and believe numero uno thing I have learnt is that every Indian has a very nice public facade they have built up. I'm not trying to say that everyone out there is scum of the earth material quite the opposite. They may have opinions that they have the common sense to keep to themselves. 

Then what is the problem you may ask? Well I'll tell you what's the problem, its when people try to subjugate others to their will. While that may sound melodramatic in modern society, I feel that as human beings have evolved so have our methods of social interaction. This brings us to the main point at hand, Indian Aunties. 

You may have just let out an involuntary sigh and you can't be blamed. For me, the things I hate mainly about staying in my motherland, is the heat, the mosquitoes and the aunties. For a person from a different ethnicity this may be relatable or it might not be so but I feel like Indians most certainly have come across incidents that don't particularly make them feel all that happy. 

The other day as I walked to the shop nearby to get some stuff for the house I passed by a group of aunties talking as they saw me they spoke quite loudly knowing that I could hear them."Oh I wonder if these children remove their masks when they sit down to eat at their table" one of them said in a haughty tone. I was wearing a mask at that time and none of them wore any. Under my mask my cheeks grew red. I looked straight ahead with my head held high and paid them no attention but their words had found their mark. Why couldn't they mind their business and leave people alone to do as they pleased. I walked further onward and I walked past the playground where their children played. None wore masks. It struck me that I shouldn't really surprise me that we have such a high rate of COVID-19 cases.

Now the known habitats of the Indian Aunty is in front of each other's houses,association meetings and of course by the street. They often stay in tight knit packs waiting for prey like hungry coyotes. And when an unsuspecting teenager walks by they let loose. The smirk,giggle and pass comments. The ideology of most Indian Aunties isn't very difficult to comprehend on the other hand it is exceedingly simple,it is quite rigid and conservative however. 

It begins at birth itself. Boys are welcomed and receiving a girl child can be described in a single sentence" Oh well I suppose it isn't too bad". Now other than the fact that they are both human beings the routes they are forced along are not particularly similar. I can't elucidate on the childhood of an Indian girl since I don't think I have anywhere near knowledge on the subject. The boy is encouraged to not cry because it is unbecoming to cry if you are a male. They are encouraged to be outgoing and play outside. This phase quickly transitions to one of study where they suddenly inform the child that playing won't get them anywhere and somewhere around grade 7 an increasing pressure is exerted on the child to start studying for longer houses. This comes to a head in 10th grade where they are denied to even leave their houses for much of the time.

10th passes them by and this is when they aunties first truly make their presence known to the individual. The telephone is set into a frenzy the day the board results come out and people who might as well have been non existent previously have suddenly come alive with curiosity regarding the individual's marks. If they get a low percentage(Any thing below 85%) they are given words of pity which are nowhere near sincere and are treated to lectures on how they ought to study more and how the neighbour's children have gotten straight A's. The child is bashed and mentally subjugated and made to think that they are worthless because they couldn't get a good grade. The one who gets a good grade is given a few curt words of encouragement and encouraged to go Science because that is the "only one with scope". On the other hand students who scored poorly are told to go for an Arts stream because their worthless selves are only good for that. Its not like Arts can ever end up doing good for humanity.

11th and 12th are the dark ages for Science students(I would talk about commerce,arts and humanities students but as I mentioned before I don't feel confident enough about my knowledge in those particular areas). The attitude from 10th is accentuated and stretched out for 2 years. The words entrance test and worth become synonymous in use. Droves of students are sent to entrance coaching institutes to become IITians and Medicos. To become doctors or engineers when they'd rather do something else. The pressure reaches a high level in this particular phase and unfortunately some students can't cope with it and end up killing themselves. The parents can only wail and regret but the others don't learn, no one is bothered about it after a week or two. It's quite ironic that the entrance industry promises that all their students can get Engineering and Medical seats when in reality for the last NEET there were 78,000 seats available.... for 13,66,945 candidates. 

The now unhappy and disillusioned individual is encouraged to be a workaholic and is soon after encouraged to wed a bride who he doesn't know but that his family approves of and will be good for him according to them. They are encouraged to have children soon and if the society succeeds in exuding enough influence on the individual they will have now become one of the very people they had grown to despise and the horrible cycle continues.

Is this how neighbours are supposed to be? Are they not supposed to be beacons of hope and love? An anchor to hold onto in sorrow and to keep us grounded in joy? When did we as human beings become so selfish, so entitled and so envious of others and their happiness?

I hope you, the reader don't end up as a person who is consumed by hatred. Always do what you feel is right and you know you won't regret. Its one hell of a world and the only one you can rely on to always be there for you is yourselves.

Later

Aby